Doggy style

The puppies were hungry for their milk again.  Thomasina lit the fire to keep herself warm.

Meanwhile, inside Ambrose's head...

"All right, I have the chain, I killed my pet deer, and I've shaved all my body hair.  Tell me what to do next," Ambrose asked his three imaginary friends.

Meanwhile, on vacation...

Johann began to think that this sweat lodge experience was going to be more than he had bargained for. At the very least, he hoped, it would help with his body hair issues.

A slight tickling, at first

Gröthius was really enjoying his first skinny-dip... until the nibbling began.

Apologies

I've been swamped with a project all week, and so thus no Bad Etchings.  I promised to do better, he lied.

One day in Yorkshire...

Sir William Garthwaite was so odious a landlord that even the wolves and sheep teamed up to chase him down and ravage him.

It's the little things that give us away

With her plot to kill him already teetering out of control, Queen Bathilde tried to get the King to take his seat, although she knew that everyone was already aware of the elephant in the room.

Just get in the car

Archimedes reflected that the worst part of the custodial handoff for the weekend was having to deal once again with the craziness of his ex-wife, as he explained for the umpteenth time that he was not going to use the compass and the square for discipline.

Them's good eatin'

Aloysius wasn't sure what it was, but he knew he sure wanted a drumstick.

One day in the Æther

"So I says to him, Zephyrus Schmephyrus, you'd better be good at something other than blowing."

Meanwhile, at Comic-Con

"OK, guys... oh, wow, what was in that drink?... Guys, what was that safe word thing again?  Guys?  Hey, wait, that doesn't feel... ohhhh... I think I'm... ahhhh... "

Once upon a time...

Many people do not know this, but before the Seven Dwarfs met Snow White, there was Diggory.

Hi ho, the glamorous life

"Master of the King's Bedpan" turned out not to be as honorific as Llewellyn had been led to believe.

A woman scorned

True to her word, Lavinia had her revenge on the son of bitch who knocked her up.

One day in the garden

"Hey, no, I'm pretty sure those are the ones that are safe to lick.  Go on, you go first!"

Meanwhile, on the Silk Road...

"So then I says to him... I says... get this... I says to him, 'That's not my finger either, laddie!'"

LOL whut?

When asked about his Burning Man experience, Clint could only reply, "Whoa, dude..."

Meanwhile, in Bavaria

"Woo-wee!" cried Raphael, as he raced to join in the fun.

Truer words...

After a while, Betty began to wonder what was in those shortbreads Marjorie shared with her, because her neighbor seemed more attractive than she had ever known her to be before.

Meanwhile, in Bavaria

As she posed for her official portrait, Queen Philippa thought once again that although he was part of her husband's family crest, the sloth was just damned creepy.

Late one night...

Once the 'shrooms kicked in, Camilla found that pointing the kaleidoscope at Sebastian's aura was fucking amazing.

Yeah, baby...

This was going way better than Sebastian had hoped when he suggested it.

Meanwhile, out in the galaxy

"For the last time, Groot, stop being such a baby and get in the water!!"

Tough choices

Times were so hard, that all Bartholomew had left was his pet tapeworm Ignacius.

The classics never go out of style

To Thomas and his frat brothers, pulling the old "flaming pile of dogshit" gag on their fool never got old.

Hey, girl...

Camilla did not realize until the next morning that she'd been roofied.

A heart of gold

Little known fact: in his off hours, the Dreadful Flying  Glove found that taking long walks and communing with Nature helped relax him.

(Let's see who gets both references.)

Hello, sailor!

It was in fact Giachomo's ability to turn his head 180° that caused his friend Francisco to proposition him in such a lewd manner.

Meanwhile, on vacation...

"Where... is... the restroom?"

"I don't think he speaks English, Carl."

No caption required

Yes, we know...

Once Jobie won the drag contest, there was no living with him.

Bad habits

At the height of his addiction, François was going through twenty pipettes a day.

Little known facts

Despite what would seem to be his obvious advantages, Janus was often lost.

Bunch of fairies...

On her days off, Glinda the Good Witch would often go visit her friend Le Petit Prince.

What winning looks like

"Whee!" cried Hedwig.  "That bitch Carlotta fell off—we're ahead!  Faster!  Faster!"  Rupert, on the other hand, regretted his choices.

Nice piece of ass...

She was just a donkey, but Isabel still understood what Bayard's cry of, "Hey, it's my turn next!" meant.

Meanwhile in Perugia...

Cuthbert practiced and practiced, but his audition for the synchronized ribbon team still ended in risible disaster.

She's a neckless kind of girl...

It wasn't until after she decapitated him that Leander realized that the correct answer to Urania's "Does this orb make my ass look fat?" was not the first one that came to mind.

Meanwhile in the apse...

"I swear, Father, it was this big around.  I could barely wrap my fingers around it."

Damned if you do...

Knowing he'd be blamed for the suicide yet again, Grenzelbub desperately tried to save the pauper, but to no avail.

Digging dat ditch...

Sebastian took a break from work to do his "dat ass tho" dance.

Meanwhile, in Segovia...

When Isabella offered to compare huevos with Juan Carlos, this is not what he was expecting.

The vagaries of the sex trade

And that's why he never knew the nun was his mother.

Slow and steady, my ass!

"Faster, you dumb son-of-a-bitch, faster!"

Love is a bitch

Eros knew that his mother had never liked Psyche, but he never dreamed she'd replace her head with a giant nipple.

Et tu, Pythagoras?

Primrose thought it was jolly unfair of her tutor to strand her on the isle with nothing but her geometer's tools for survival.

Nom nom!

Distracted by the intricacies of her new chapeau, Dorothy never saw the lion stalking her until it was too late.

Meanwhile, on the caravanserai

This was not the first time Cecile had caught the camel looking.

Fee-Fie-Foe-Fum

Agatha never could understand why she continued to play hide-n-seek with the human children.  They always hid in places too small for her hands to reach, and besides, they never allowed her to eat anyone she found.

Bless her heart.

Cecily was a special child; nevertheless her love for the duck was disturbing.

Drop that bass...

As the music picked up speed and the hellebore kicked in, Reginald knew that it was only a matter of time before he was naked.  Hopefully, this time it wouldn't be on Trafalgar Square.